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Over the past couple of weeks I have been thinking and talking about how the expectations we hold for ourselves and others is the root of all our disappointments. Think about it, the last time you were disappointed, why were you disappointed? The majority of the time is has to do with a failed expectation of either ourselves or someone else.

Bad customer service was actually due to the expectation you held of the person serving you and how you expected that exchange to occur. Disappointment in a friend’s reaction to your news was due to the expectation you of what you thought or hoped their reaction to be.

So in a world of daily failed expectations, how do you keep positive?


Now that you know about failed expectations, the next time you are disappointed in your customer service experience or in the response of a loved one to your news, take a breath and let it go.

When you do have great customer experience, enjoy it, smile, thank them. When you get a great response from a loved one, enjoy it, smile and thank them. You can’t control the responses of those around you, but you can control your response.


The best way to avoid failed expectations is to surround yourself with people who find the good in almost everything. Or at least people who have consistent reactions to news you want to share.

The last year I have filtered out those people who do not support my positive attitude and instead filled my life with people who see the good, the happy and share in elation at happy news. By taking out the negative you can fill the voids with positivity.


How do you treat people on a daily basis? I know I can be very antisocial sometimes and go out of my way to avoid talking with strangers. For some reason I have one of those faces that everyone seems to want to talk to!

But I do try to be kind when people talk to me (most of the time at least) and will strike up a conversation even though it feels like it is killing me on the inside. But, I have to remember, that person may or may not have anyone they regularly engage with and maybe by reaching out, that is the only contact they have with the world.

I also try to be kind with listening to friends and family and even if I have concerns about an idea they might have, I try to share in their excitement even if I don’t really understand why they are so excited.

In short, failed expectation occurs when we don’t experience the response we were hoping or expecting from others. We can’t control others behaviour but we can control our response and change our surroundings if need be.

How do you deal with failed expectations? Do you hold expectations of others? Please share in the comments!

Light & Love
<3 ash

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